Friday, May 26, 2017

Yesterday's Near Miss: The Benny Hill Incident

Distractions come in many forms.  Mobile phones, bees in the car, eating while driving ect. Yesterday it was in the form of a long legged woman walking a dog.

I was riding downhill on NW 123rd about where it curves to the left and turns into Woodland Ave or Dr or Rd at the entrance of Campbell Rec Park on the right.  On the sidewalk was our dog walker in a black skirt and white top.  Leaving Campbell Rec was a burgundy Jeep Grand Cherokee driven by an elderly man.  Me, I was preparing for the curve and the climb to 128th St.

I took a glance at her and then resumed business at hand.  No time to undress her in my mind, I'm working at 25 mph on a collection of carbon tubes contacting the pavement with thin Mavic wheels and thin German tires with a climb waiting for me in a matter of seconds.  One error and I'm eating concrete and wondering about skin grafts and bone repair and the dreaded hip replacement.

I also spotted the Jeep. 

 "Don't do it you dirty dog.  Don't pull out in front of me you bastard,"
I said to myself.  Of course, when things got critical he let go of the brake and stepped on the gas.


 I was a bit upset.  I did not think he could hear that since I felt my voice was a bit weak.

What to do now?  Option 1:  apply both brakes and hope to come to a controlled stop.  Option 2: pass his ass and yell at him.  I chose the latter since I had ample speed and he was barely moving as to get a better sniff at the dog walker.

Windows started rolling down.  Perhaps he heard me.  Now he sees me.  Eye contact established. He was aged.  Probably has not had an erection for a few decades.


That's all I said.  Resume zooming up the hill.  Take the lane.  F him.  I'll soon be on the sidepath leading to the Greenbelt.

The trap may have been sprung but I was aware and got through it unscathed.  What will the future bring?

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